Author Archives: f2x

Canine Quintessence

So today’s problem is that Gail seems to lack any inkling of empathy. Sure, to outside observers she seems adorable, but behind those cute puppy eyes, I get the feeling that there’s no one actually there.

To contrast with Grace, I could feel the presence of another soul, as in literally feel it. This might sound a little crazy, even a little macabre, but hear me out.

As I held on to Grace during her euthanasia, I felt her presence leaving after the first injection and said so out loud. The vet then informed me that she was in fact dying at that very moment. He told me the first injection was actually lethal, and that even if he did nothing else, she would still die, but it would just take longer. The second injection is used to get it over with and immediately stop the heart.

It was a shitty time to learn that little bit of trivia, but I digress.

The point is, I can feel that presence… that ghost inside. It’s something that is real. You can feel it when you hug someone verses hugging a pillow. It’s not just their pulse, their warmth, and the rise and fall of their chest as they breath. There is something in them. I like to think it is their soul.

You know, for some reason I cannot remember a whole lot about Grace’s transition from puppy to dog. That first year was a bit of a blur, but it seemed like from the start that she was in there. I don’t get that same sense with Gail. As spunky and lively as Gail is, it’s like she’s a simulation of a dog.

I dunno… Maybe it takes time for that spark to develop. On the plus side, she continues to grow at an astonishing rate, she seems genuinely content, she eats her dog food, begs for dog treats, has endless energy to play with me and her toys, is very healthy, and has adjusted well to her new home… If only it felt like she were actually in there.

Kudos

OK, it’s the usual spiel. You can thank George and/or Glenn for this week’s jokes. Not that anyone else would ever bother, but the submission page is still there… gathering dust. I’ve also got an interesting spam collection happening with flush2x@gmail.com, but you could also send me jokes through that e-mail address as well.

Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read. – Groucho Marx

Pax,

-f2x

Poco a Poco

And now it’s time for the weekly Gail report.

I have had nearly 4 weeks with my new pup, and Gail is now 12 weeks old. It is utterly amazing how long that four weeks feels, but also how much progress has been made. Just yesterday she was able to go down the back door stairs for the first time.

This is a huge breakthrough, since she has to go down three steps in order to go outside. Once she started doing it on her own, we practiced again and again, down the stairs, out the door, around the yard, in the door, up the stairs, and have a treat! Huzzah!

And after all that, she still went in and pissed on the carpet, but that’s what the Bissel is for… That’s also why I’m replacing the wall to wall carpet with the sheet vinyl flooring that I purchased from Home Depot a couple weeks ago. It looks like real wood. I’m installing it myself, so it might take me a while.

One other thing Gail has managed to accomplish is getting up onto the couch on her own. She’s still working on being able to jump up onto the bed, but for now there is a step she can use to climb up on her own.

She fully grasps the concept of her name, and usually obeys “come here”. We’re also making pretty good progress on “stay”, and most importantly, “Let it go” with regards to the cat. As Gail has gotten bigger, putting an end to her predatory cat chasing is an absolute priority.

Of course to train her, I grab her by the neck and slam her against the wall as hard as I can while yelling, “Let it go!” She usually drops the cat after the first three slams, but more recently it feels like she’s finally starting to take the hint and avoid the cat altogether… Don’t I wish… If I’m not there to say, “A-Ah! Let it go!” followed by a treat, she will chase Alex like a walking squeak toy.

And that’s why four weeks feels like forever. A few nights ago she picked up her water dish and slung it around the kitchen while I was doing the dishes, then she chased the cat while I stumbled around on the newly installed “Slip ‘N Slide”.

But then she curled up next to me in bed last night and slept like a little angel, and for a moment I thought, it’s going to be all right.

Kudos

Once again, a big shout out to Glenn and George, and a reminder that our submission page is for sumbitting jokes, not spammy garbage about making money on YouTube. Same can be said for using flush2x@gmail.com as well. Great for sending jokes, but at least Google does a fine job of filtering out the junk.

It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and prove it.

Pax,

-f2x