Sunday, September 6, 2020

I Love My Dog

So during the last fireside chat, I might have given some of you the impression that I don’t like my dog. Well, I do, but with such boundless energy she can be very tiring. I’m getting on in my years, and having a living bouncy ball sap my energy every day is frustrating.

But Gail is my baby girl, and though she often tests my limits, she does have her up sides. Off hand I can’t think of any, but… Oh wait! She does actually settle down, and when I’m sitting on the couch or lying in bed, she is right there snuggled up next to me. She looks at me in such a way as to tell me that I am her everything.

And Gail is still just a pup. Granted, she is an 85 pound musclebound pup, but her brain is still developing. It is always a pleasant surprise when something finally “clicks” in that head of hers, and she learns to control some of the less desirable aspects of her behavior.

Make no mistake, there is a long way to go before Gail is what I would consider a “good” dog, and I have had enough dogs to know the difference. In the meantime, she still gets plenty of toys and treats and belly rubs.

She is going to be great some day.



Sunday, August 2, 2020

Happy First Birthday Gail!

August 4 was Gail’s birthday. She’s come a long way since she was a little puppy, and she still has a long way to go.

Can I be frank though? I got Gail to help me cope with the loss of my beloved Grace who passed away nearly a year ago. Unfortunately this did not pan out like I’d hoped. Gail is a beautiful Labrador, but when you see her in person, it’s apparent she lacks the lovability that Grace had.

She has no impulse control. When you try to pet her she wants to chew on you, or jump on you, or claw/kick you. Not in a mean way, but in an overexcited loss of control way. She also swings her head around like it was a mace on a battle field.

She barks a lot. A LOT. She growls and barks at dogs and cats on the TV. She also howls like a %^&*ing beagle. This can happen out of the blue for no reason, and it’s beyond infuriating. It’s 3AM, not a creature in the whole neighborhood is stirring, and suddenly this dog starts howling and barking. Oh, the neighbors are not amused.

She’s a digger! Yeah, all dogs will dig, but this is done out of spite. It’s a shame I don’t have the mineral rights to my lot. If I let her out, and don’t supervise her the whole time, she will start excavating.

I could go on, but suffice to say, living with Gail has been a rather unpleasant and thus far unrewarding challenge. If I had known then what she would be like at one year, I would not have gotten this dog.

If there’s anything good to say, she seems like she’s genuinely happy here. She likes the food, the treats, the car rides, the walks, the games of fetch, and torturing the cat. Sometimes she even seems to like me.

Happy Birthday, Gail.



Sunday, May 17, 2020

Strep Throat Still Sucks

For the past several weeks I’d been dealing with this painful lump in my throat that made it hurt to swallow. I knew it was either strep or cancer. The good news is, it doesn’t appear to be cancer, but it has taken a couple different rounds of antibiotics to knock this shit out of me.

My lymph nodes are still sore, so I’ve been trying to get as much rest as possible. Not that simple when work keeps piling up at my job, but what else can you do?

I am getting better though.


Even Glenn’s not sending me much in the way of jokes this week. It’s not like anyone really reads these jokes anymore. I’ll just start posting the latest Dow Jones reports. Got a joke? I’d love to hear it. Head over to the submission page and type it in for me! You can also email it to

“My sore throats are always worse than anyone’s.” ― Jane Austen



Sunday, May 10, 2020

Surviving Strep

Something I’ve been keeping a low key on was an ongoing sore throat. I figured it would eventually go away, but then it got hard to swallow. As of right now, my throat still hurts, but I’m finally on antibiotics. Let’s hope I can be rid of this in the next few days.

So why did I let it go on for so long? Partially because I was needed badly at work, and also because you couldn’t get in to see a doctor face to face because of the whole Covid19 hype. After the first of the month, a few places started opening back up. I was able to get in to see someone to swab my throat, confirm it was strep, and prescribe the antibiotics.

Of course now they’ve added “sore throat” to the list of symptoms for Covid19, but a month ago they were telling us that it wasn’t a symptom. Next month they are probably going to tell us that “blue eyes” is a symptom of Covid19. No wonder the nut jobs think this is a hoax.

When one side starts to get paranoid and the other side gets frustrated and annoyed, good things never happen.


George keeps sending “inspirational” emails, so we are still relying on Glenn for the jokes. Maybe you should try getting off your lazy ass and help by sending jokes to my submission page or drop me a laugh or two off at my email address.

“We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.” ― Aesop