The New Restaurant

In an alley, two roaches were munching in a dumpster when one of them starts talking about a new restaurant.

“I was in that new restaurant across the street,” the roach said to his pal. “It’s so clean! The kitchen is spotless, and the floors are gleaming white. There is no dirt anywhere. It’s so sanitary that the whole place shines.”

“Please,” said the other roach frowning. “Not while I’m eating!”

Late Night Caller

The couple was fast asleep when their phone rang at 2 AM. The woman picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, “How should I know? That’s 200 miles from here!” before hanging up.

Still groggy, her husband asked, “Who was it, Honey?”

The wife said, “I have no idea. It was just some woman asking if the coast was clear.”

Sunday, April 28, 2019

So Who’s Watching mBlip?

I run a few different sites, and on the backend I have a stats program running to get some idea of the viewership. I also like to be fairly transparent about it, since I’m not using these stats to track individuals or for targeted marketing purposes. Sometimes, however, the results are a little disheartening if not downright embarrassing.

At first glance, mBlip doesn’t look like it’s doing too badly. Because it grows so fast, I usually reset the site every couple of weeks. When I do, the stat counter stops working, so I have to delete and reinstall it. Basically, I can’t see any long term trends with mBlip, but what I can see bothers me more.

mBlip’s home page gets a fair bit of traffic… Mostly through server farms and China… And that’s about all it gets. No one seems interested in visiting the individual posts. The whole point of the site is to watch recently released videos, and my stat plugin is essentially telling me that no one watches the videos… except me… but I don’t count.

On the other side, Flush Twice seems to be chugging along nicely. While an uncomfortably high percentage of visitors trace back to server farms, the majority of them come from actual ISP’s (ie: Real people). Curiously, the comic gets a disproportionately higher amount of traffic. That’s awesome. Thankfully, these rants get ignored. That’s awesome too.

In the end, I suppose the visitor counts don’t really matter so long as I enjoy what I’m doing. I like a lot of the videos that mBlip collects, and I still think it’s a great way to find something interesting to watch. I also like taking care of Flush Twice. There have been over 1100 jokes individually reviewed and published. That’s kind of impressive.

So who’s watching mBlip? Me. Just me. Occasionally Google or some other search engine will randomly refer somebody to a video page, but after two years and 5 months, It’s time to concede that the concept doesn’t have any appeal to a wider audience.


Kudos

Once again I want to thank George for sending in the jokes. In case you were wondering, our submission page still works. You can also do what George does and email flush2x@gmail.com. Thanks for visiting. It’s been my most heartfelt pleasure to provide you with a laugh or two.

Pax,

-f2x

Why I Got Married

While sitting at the bar, Tony was telling his pals how excited he was about his upcoming wedding.

His older friend Saul explained, “You know, twenty years ago, I got married so that I could get laid 3 or 4 times a week.”

“What are you talking about, Saul?” remarked Tony. “You aren’t even married!”

Saul explained, “That’s because ten years ago, I got divorced for the same reason!”