Sunday, June 5, 2016


Even Lower Than Before

Up until the 20th of May, things were looking pretty good, but now the daily numbers continue to suffer. I’ve got a theory, but I could be wrong. Judging by the visitors I’m currently getting, it looks as though there aren’t as many bots. They look as if they are real people. If this is the case, then I’m not actually losing visitors… I’m just catching a break from the bots that have plagued Flush Twice for the past decade.

Perhaps the hosting companies are finally patching their systems, but I’m guessing the botnets are regrouping for an even uglier assault. We shall see.

Weekend Jokes Won’t Last

Here’s the deal: 5 days a week is about 260 jokes a year. 7 days a week means I need to scrounge up another 105 more. I’m not saying it isn’t possible… I’m saying that given the amount of money I’m being paid to do this job ($zero), it’s not worth pushing myself that hard.

Five per week is fair enough. I only started posting on the weekends because I wanted to see if it would gain Flush Twice more visitors, and that’s been a total bust.

The good news is that since there’s a bunch of jokes already scheduled, weekend jokes will continue through June. In July, we revert back to Monday through Friday.

“Comics?”

Thanks for asking. As you know, the jokes are more like “found content” because people just e-mail them to me, and I clean them up (editing/formatting/grammar/spelling/tense/etc.)and re-post them here. It doesn’t require too much creativity. It’s more like an assembly line job.

Comics, on the other hand, require me to come up with something somewhat original. It takes time to come up with the idea, time to make the art, time to format the post, time to fix the mistakes I made along the way… Yeah, it takes time, and right now I’m using my spare time to get things done around the house, get some rest, and help out family and friends.

Once I get things cleaned up, get some rest, and people stop bugging me, then I’ll get back to making comics. Til then,

Pax,

-f2x

The General’s Valet

A retired four-star general ran into his former orderly, also retired, in a Manhattan bar and spent the rest of the evening persuading him to come work for him as his valet.

“Your duties will be exactly the same as they were in the army,” the general said. “Nothing to it. You’ll catch on again fast.”

Next morning promptly at eight o’clock, the ex-orderly entered the ex-general’s bedroom, pulled open the drapes, gave the general a gentle shake, strode around the other side of the bed, spanked the general’s wife on the ass and said, “OK, sweetheart, it’s back to the village for you.”