Sunday, March 15, 2020

So When Do We Panic?

Of course no one really knows how fucked up things are going to get, but I’m not planning on getting too flustered over it. I’m already an introvert, so it’s not like you have to tell me to avoid other people.

Of course COVID-19 is on tour, and it’s coming to a town near you. Apparently the symptoms range from nothing at all to death. That’s quite a spread, and that’s why some people believe it’s a hoax conjured by the “dems”, and others are freaking out and buying all the hand sanitizer and Charmin in the tri-state area.

Honestly, I could really do without all the drama. I still have to go to work in the morning, and the vast majority of people around me are not about to shelter in place when their job is on the line.

I foresee three possible futures: The first is where a whole bunch of people get sick and die. In the end, the survivors will be mostly immune, and we will pick up the pieces and carry on.

The second is that this will all blow over, and while a few people may get really sick and die, it’s probably nobody you know. The “Told-you-so” pundits will crow about it until you wish the virus had taken you.

The third outcome is a bit more complicated. They’re going to milk this. It’s going to be like “Nine-Eleven” in slow motion, only this time the terrorists will be people who refuse to comply with the draconian edicts imposed by the government. Imagine the TV show “COPS”, but busting people for being outdoors without a hazmat suit and shooting suspects for coughing in public.

The “shit show” is about to begin.


Well thankfully George and Glenn are still alive and sending me jokes via email. Our submission page remains open in spite of the social distancing, and as always you can email me at

If a Black Death could be spread throughout the world once in every generation survivors could procreate freely without making the world too full. ― Bertrand Russell



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