Author Archives: f2x

At the bar, Mark was telling his friend Bill that his wife had won a free trip to a day spa.

“She said they treated her like royalty,” explained Mark. “She got a massage, did up her hair, painted her nails, and they even gave her a mudpack facial.”

“I bet she looked amazing when she got home,” commented Bill.

“Well, yeah, she looked great for two days,” said Mark. “But then the mud fell off.”

As a the date of the solar eclipse approached, the director of a local planetarium published a warning in the local newspaper about the eclipse, and warned the community not to look directly into the sun.

The newspaper then received an indignant letter from a local resident. “If an eclipse is so dangerous,” she reasoned, “they should never have decided to hold one in the first place and ought to cancel it!”

A couple was sitting in the living room, sipping wine.

Out of the blue, the wife remarked, “I love you!”

“Is that you or the wine talking?” asked the husband.

“It’s me,” replied the wife. “I was talking to the wine.”