From Dust to Dust

Little Johnny approached his Sunday school teacher and asked, “Mr. Withers? Is it true that we came from dust?”

Mr. Withers smiled and said, “Why yes, Johnny. We all come from dust.”

“And is it true,” continued Johnny, “that when we die, we go back to dust?”

With a more solemn look, Mr. Withers nodded, “Yes, Johnny. When we pass we go back to dust. Why do you ask?”

“Well I think there’s a man under my bed,” said Johnny, “but I’m not sure if he’s coming or going!”

From Dust to Dust
1 vote

Smoking Cessation

Buddy was talking to his friend, “I went to my doctor to see if he could help me give up smoking. He suggested that every time I felt like a smoke I should reach for a bar of chocolate.”

His friend nodded in bemusement and asked, “So how’s that working out for you?”

“Terrible!” exclaimed Buddy. “I can’t get the chocolate to light.”

Smoking Cessation
1 vote

Military Reprimand

A young soldier stood before his commanding officer for a reprimand.

After going through a list of various transgressions, the CO says, “And another thing, I didn’t see you in camouflage practice this morning.”

“Thank you, Sir,” the soldier replied.

Military Reprimand
1 vote

Gardening

Marv and Saul were drinking at the bar. Marv was looking particularly down in the dumps.

“You need a hobby,” suggested Saul. “You should try gardening.”

“I already tried it,” replied Marv. “I’m a terrible gardener.”

“It can’t be that bad,” remarked Saul.

“Oh yeah? Last year I had a rock garden,” explained Marv. “Half of them died.”

Gardening
1 vote

Animal Crackers

The boss returned from lunch only to find his blonde secretary spreading out a box of animal crackers on her desk.

“What the heck are you doing?” asked the boss.

In an aggravated tone the blonde replied, “I’m looking for one of the animals.”

“Why?” he pressed.

“It says right on the box,” she explained, “Do not eat if seal is broken.”

Animal Crackers
1 vote