How to Check a Cat for Deadness

Tommy ran up to his kindergarten teacher at recess and cried, “Miss Reynolds, there’s a cat over there by the swings!”
“Well leave it alone, and maybe it will find its way back home,” replied the teacher.
“I don’t think so,” said Tommy. “It’s a dead cat.”
“How do you know it’s dead?” asked Miss Reynolds.
“Because I pissed in its ear, and it didn’t move,” said Tommy.
“You did WHAT?!” exclaimed the teacher.
“You know,” explained the boy, “I leaned over and went ‘Pssst!’ and it didn’t move.”

How to Check a Cat for Deadness
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