In a Seattle, Washington college classroom, they were discussing the qualifications to be President of the United States. It was pretty simple – the candidate must be a natural born citizen of at least 35 years of age. However, one girl in the class immediately started in on how unfair was the requirement to be a natural born citizen. In short, her opinion was that this requirement prevented many capable individuals from becoming president. The class was taking it in and letting her rant, but everyone’s jaw hit the floor when she wrapped up her argument by stating, “What makes a natural born citizen any more qualified to lead this country than one born by C-section?”
Pathos in the Plumbing
I have a serious food addiction right now, and Ohio is just about the worst place on Earth to try to lose weight. I have enough food in the freezer to last half a year, but I'll be back at the store to stock up again at the end of September. Currently I have around 8 pounds of cheese, over 15 pounds of meats, loads of frozen vegetables, and a pantry so full, there are boxes of staples on top of the cabinets. Did I mention the candy bars?
The thing is, I have to lose weight. It is affecting my ability to freely move. I cannot breath while I am tying my shoes, I practically have to dislocate my shoulder to wipe my ass, and I am no longer feeling sassy. I fear that if I do not do something soon, it may have negative consequences on my ability to do my job.
Of course once you get this far, "eat less and exercise" is not going to work. It is like being so far in debt that you can't afford the minimum payment due. If I am to win this battle, I am going to need help.
Wish me luck.
Glenn is off this week, so it is just George's jokes and what I could scrounge up from the net. If you like, you could send a joke or two to our submission page. I also take submissions via email@example.com.
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What is Flush Twice?
Flush Twice is a JOTD (Joke of the Day) website. New jokes are published every Monday through Friday (midnight EST). There is also a comic in the sidebar that updates every Saturday. We’ve been operating since May of 2003.
Jokes are generously provided by visitors like yourself. If you would like to contribute, please check out our submission page, or e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org. If you know anyone who constantly e-mails you jokes, forward them to us! We’ll take what we can get!
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(Just thought you might like to know.)
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