Hypnotic Havoc

When her husband walked in the door, the wife excitedly told him, “Dear, you know those headaches I’ve been having all of these years? Well, they’re finally gone!”

The husband was impressed and asked how she did it.

The woman explained, “I went to that new hypnotist in town, and he told me to stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat ‘I do not have a headache, I DO NOT have a headache. I DO NOT have a headache.’ Believe it or not, it worked! The headaches are all gone now.”

The husband was curious. His prowess in the bedroom had been on the decline over the years and wondered if the hypnotist could help him as well. His wife encouraged him to try it, and the next day he made an appointment.

Following his appointment with the hypnotist, the husband came home, ripped off his clothes, picked up his wife and carried her into the bedroom. He laid her on the bed and said, “Don’t move, I’ll be right back.”

He disappeared into the bathroom for a moment and then came back to make sweet, passionate love to his wife like never before.

Basking in the afterglow his wife said, “That was wonderful!”

The husband said, “Don’t move! I’ll be right back.”

He went back into the bathroom, came back a moment later, and jumped in for round two with his wife. It was even better than the first time!

Her head was spinning, but the wife sat up and said, “This is amazing!”

Her husband again said, “Don’t move, I’ll be right back,” and slipped into the bathroom yet again.

This time his wife was curious. She quietly crept to the door and peeked through the open crack to see how he was doing it.

There he was standing in front of the mirror saying, “She is not my wife. She is NOT my wife. She is NOT MY WIFE!”

Thursday, February 1, 2018

Major Behind The Scenes Change!

I’m very pleased to announce that Flush Twice has successfully been migrated to a new webhost!

What? Why? Is this still the same site?

Yes, I’m still in charge around here, and everything is running great. I just signed on to be hosted by SiteGround for MANY reasons, but here’s a few things you can enjoy:

  • Faster page loads!
  • More reliable uptime!

… and my favorite:

  • —- HTTPS! —-

The other thing I like is they actually do have 24/7 customer support. My trusty old webhost of 12 years was bought out by Endurance International Group a while back, and they pretty much got rid of all their technical support. When I had a back-end issue with Flush Twice, I couldn’t get ahold of anyone to help me. SiteGrounds has support, https, and a more modern interface.

It’s taken me a while to figure out this new hosting site, but I think we’re gonna like it here.



Sisters of Scandal

A meeting was called about a troubling matter. Mother superior stood before the other sisters flanked by Monsignor Francis.

“I feel it is our duty to inform you of something very serious,” began the Reverend Mother. “We have discovered a case of gonorrhea within the walls of our convent.”

“Thank God,” said Sister Agnes from the back. “I’m so tired of chardonnay.”